Engrish

On a side note, before I forget... here are a few things that students have said that are a little off color or plainly, just bad Engrish. ^_^

"I could never live with someone I couldn't copulate with."
[read copulate as COOPERATE]

"I like penis butter."
[try PEANUT BUTTER]

"2 years ago, I got hit by a car. Until this day, my leg is still hung over."
[uh... her leg still hurts]

Teacher: "Do you work with your hands?"
Student: "Eh? Hand job?"

"You look beautiful today, but you need to change your stockings."
[How to politely tell your boss she has a run in her stockings.]

"Suddenly, a bus came out from my behind."
[Ouch. A bus came at him from behind.]

"I cunt."
[What happens when a Japanese person learns from Aussies/Brits/Kiwis. A mispronunciation of the word CAN'T]

"Will you get off with me?"
[Will you give me some time off?]

Student: "I had a very bad stomachache."
Teacher: "Why?"
Student: "Because I touched a turtle."
[This one is hilarious,but I think you had to have been there for this to make any sense.]